Valentine's what?

This morning as I listened to a talk I was reminded that it was Valentine's Day. Actually, I can't say that I didn't notice the commercialized holiday advertised in the form of decorations and specialty holiday items in the many stores. Nor did I miss all the Hallmark commercials throughout the past few weeks. I still, somehow, managed to wake up, get dressed, leave my house, hop on my bike to ride to my destination (The Sitting Frog Zen Center) and still failed to remember it was 'the' day.

Something that my hubby and I agreed on from the very beginning was that we both had a disdain for the holiday created by big business. Now, don't get me wrong, we're not holding picket signs outside of the local Walgreen's in protest of greeting cards and stuffed teddy bears being sold - we simply don't celebrate the holiday. We figure if we have to use one day out of the year to tell each other how much we love each other, we're probably in trouble. Granted, it is possible that we're both scarred from the lack of Valentine cards we received, or rather, didn't receive in grade school but really, that's simply a possibility. ;)

So while today was a day for lovers, I celebrated it getting to know new friends over lunch, spending the late afternoon with a very tired Tech Director, creating a Facebook page for a project my sister and I are working on, doing research for the project, catching up on some reading, felting petals for two new flowers, and finally writing this. And I must say, it was a great day.

Your stories awaken me

Your eyes; brown, soft, loving.
Smiling heart exudes to the surface.
Warm hands hold mine; gently rubbing.

Waking up in a strange place; unfamiliar.
Lonely; unknown surrounds.
Stories upon stories. So many, all different.


Awaken; dreams disrupted through the night.
Reminded of the familiar; true love.
Your eyes; faithful, consistent, real.

Home; waking up next to me.
Known surroundings; fulfilled.
Chapter upon chapter; building together.

The light shines on...

I haven’t written in a blog for a very long time. So long, it’s been years rather than months. When my hubby and I moved to Phoenix in 2004, I blogged religiously on at least a weekly basis. Then, little-by-little I got busier and life got more hectic. My blogs dwindled down to once a month. Then, less and less. Then altogether I stopped. There are many reasons for that, busy life aside. I was going through a very dark time in my life. I didn’t realize it at the time; or rather, I chose to ignore it. Not completely out of character for me, as much as I hate to admit that. I’ll admit that I learned long ago how to cope with certain unhealthy-mainstays in my life, as I’m sure you can relate to. It was these coping mechanisms that I resorted to, in addition to some new-found bad behaviors that blossomed more out of control than I ever would have thought.

 

Yes, it was a dark time in my life. And unfortunately, those who are most close to me felt the repercussion of this, even if they had nothing to do with contributing to it. I can’t even begin to figure out how to apologize and make amends with those who I shut out the most. All I can do is work on this in baby-steps and that’s what I’m doing. Makes the most sense to me. Contrary to popular belief, I am a very shy person. Stems from being a shy and insecure child. I’m extrovert, don’t mind public speaking and can stand in front of a group of adults in a classroom setting to teach them; yet, I’m shy as heck. Really?? Yes, really!

Anyhow, where there is dark, there shall also be light. And I’m finally seeing the light again. I told my hubby that I feel as if the past two years have been a blur. Like living in a vortex of sorts. For those hippie friends of mine, you can relate it to a trip on a hit of acid (which I have not tried) or mushrooms (which I have.      never.       again!).  I’m a firm believer in God and know that everything that happens in our life is for a reason. Each door that closes is just making way for another one to open. A different chapter. A new start. A new day. (Etc. Etc. I think you get the drift.)

I know I’m pretty vague in this introduction blog but as time goes on, details will most likely emerge to fill in the blanks and questions you may have after digesting my words. (Hopefully no one regurgitated in the process). Something that I have realized out of these past few years of experience is that I still have not learned how not to resort to my coping-mechanisms (see above). And I also realize that it’s something that I have to learn how to overcome because some coping-mechanisms may not be healthy for us. Mine surely weren’t. Someday in the future I hope to post an entry into this blog that tells you I have finally overcome that hurdle in my life. (Just typing these words tells me that I will be doing that in the future).

Random Thoughts of the Day

So, I’ll now share some random thoughts for the day. I’ve already shared my thoughts with my hubby and my BGBF, Cory, who I had lunch with today. Why, oh why, was President Obama’s speech to our school children made such a big deal of in the media? Why were so many of my conservative friends so against their children hearing what he head to say? I honestly cannot understand and it’s not because I don’t have children of my own, although I’m sure some may think that’s the reason. The reason I don’t understand it is because although we are a divided country when it comes to politics and religion, we all still fall under the umbrella that we call and claim as our country, the United States of America. Right? And if that’s the case, that means that whoever is president of our country has the right to impart knowledge and wisdom into the young minds of our children. Even President Obama’s republican rival, Sen. John McCain publicly stated his support for our new president after acknowledging he lost the race to the White House. In my opinion, as parents and leaders, it is our responsibility to impart fair and impartial wisdom to our children by allowing them to hear and see all sides of the coin, whatever that coin may be. Now, by saying that I’m not saying that this should supersede any religious or spiritual beliefs that you may be raising your children in; rather, it should coincide with that. I just have a hard time believing we can raise children to use the free will that God gives us without allowing them the capability to critically think about all things presented to them.

And that’s my rant on that. Until the next blog post...

Tricia