Wednesday, September 23, 2009

To write or not to write???...that is the question.

I've been inspired to write for a couple of weeks now; for years now actually. Those closest to me know I've always had a goal of writing a book but haven't done it yet. With anything that is a labor of love, you have to know deep in your heart that it's the right thing to do. It has to be so ingrained in your soul that you are passionate enough to lose sleep over it. Most importantly, I've accepted that in order to write, I must move myself to the backseat. For so long, I've contemplated writing what has been in my heart out of fear for what people would think about me.

I've been one to say, many times and to many friends, that you can't care what people say or think about you. Yet, I've realized that I was saying this in vain because I truly hadn't accepted that personally about my writing. (Forgive me friends if I told you this. I lied. I didn't mean to, didn't think I was. But I did.) I do care what people think about me. Not to the point of allowing my life to be dictated by others views and perceptions of me, but enough to question my ability to write for a public audience.

A couple of things happened in the past few weeks that have forced me to self-analyze this issue. First, I met a new friend. He's also a writer. He's actually a published author and writes his own blog. In one of his blog entries entitled Art vs. Addiction, his words spoke true to me. They actually punched me in the gut and forced me to realize that I had been harboring this and had not dealt with it. I wasn't free to write because I put myself in my own writer's-block-jail. I was too concerned about writing for man, instead of writing for God, as quoted in Art vs. Addiction. I've been pondering this for days now and today, over coffee and discussion with my hubby, it came to me.

My desire to write has always been there, but the direction and audience for which I'm meant to write, wasn't clear to me. It finally is and I have my wonderful hubby, as well as my new friend, to thank for helping me see the light.

So now...the writing begins!!!

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